Open your eyes

Open your eyes! Open your eyes..? Open your eyes. Just do it. This week, I suppose life did it for me - I realised new things, learned yet more about adulthood, and gratefulness.

Australia is the hot topic of this blog, maybe you gathered that with the name...or at least i'd hope. In reality though, it represents something more, it represents almost a metaphorical, long-term journey. Don't worry, as much as it sounds like it, I'm not about to sell you some sort of "spiritual healing" journey, or a self-help/care book, because A) wtf? and B) Who has time for that stuff? Not me...

Without overdoing it, in a way, every blog represents another chapter in Australia, but also little milestones in my journey within adulthood, relationships, careers, independence - basically everything. This year, I learned how to fish, make a Cosmopolitan, maintain a life on my own, and much more...it's random isn't it, but that tells you basically how much I'm learning and growing in essentially everything I'm doing.

Now, a week since Dec left (where did the time go by the way...) things are sinking in, and now it's all on me. Ideas for fun things to do? Sort of me, but luckily my mates are wicked, so they always suggest things. But still, I'm doing more for me, and remembering this journey, it's on me to make it amazing.

Let's talk about something big though...and not just because of the hours it takes...

Booking your flight home 101

It's shit, but also beautiful. Leaving what you've built behind, the people you've come to love, unexpected love, to go home to those who you once left, people you loved, often unexpected love, the place you built so much and once left behind. See what I'm getting at? It's circular. Pain, love, pain, love. That's travelling, for you. Especially when you're this far away, and a trip home for Christmas isn't a small RyanAir flight, but a $1000 long-haul trip through places unknown, or if you're lucky, the Emirates.

As this blog somewhat actually serves as a place for aspiring/current travellers to learn from my experiences, maybe laugh at me, or manifest similar things happen to them, well - here's my shout:

'skyscanner' is your best mate. Search for "entire month" on filters rather than set days, and try to be as flexible as possible when going home. If you have to be home for a certain date, hope it's in the Australian winter when cheap flights exist, but also be prepared - don't leave it too fine, delayed flights happen all the time, cancellations too, don't put yourself at risk.

It cost around $800, due to some issues with my housing bond, I had to ask my parents for help. I'm embarrassed to admit that, but if I can't be honest here, where can I? It'll get paid back, don't you worry. I'll have to work my arse off for a few months, let me tell you...

Anyways. Just be bloody sensible. The cheapest flight might not be the best, and safety is important - check your routes, remember, sleep is important, maybe that extra $100-$200 for a safer journey and less travel time is worth it. Don't mess about. And please, for the love of god, get fucking insurance.

Get home safe, but before you do, have a wicked time. That's my mantra, sort of.

Let's talk anxiety, medical anxiety

Breath. Breath. Breath. It's wayyyy easier said than done, honestly. Please stop telling me to breath. But also, don't? I want your support. isn't anxiety such a strange, stressful and unworldly feeling. 

I've struggled with medical related health anxiety for most of my life, more seriously in adulthood, in what is called Hypochondria - the anxiety, like I said, which plays on health issues. A small cut at work? It'll get infected! Something got in your eye? It could blind me! Walking onto a football pitch...I could get injured!

Not only does it hold you back in the moment, but sometimes it even stops you getting to the moment. Hypochondria ruined my enjoyment on so many occasions playing football as a kid. A torn hip-flexor made it worse, it scared me for life, because now, I fear not playing for a long-term period again through the same, or a similar injury.

When you grow up, people just coin the term "wimp" or "be a man", "grow up", etc - but honestly, as much as I, and others laugh it off, it's no fun. 

Let's go back to 2023/24. Young lad, 18, or around that age, completing my notes ahead of Forest's game against Manchester United at the City Ground. Ready for a huge game, a huge one for my family as we have a split of Forest & United fans, on my dads side anyway, my mums side bloody hate football - passionately. Anyways, not the point - notes done, ready to commentate on a huge game of Premier League football. A small pain starts in my chest, I felt it a couple days before at a staff party, and suddenly it returned. Sharp pain in my chest and upper back. Breaths became shorter and more frequent. I ignored it, tried to lock myself into being busy, but soon it took over, I went to play with the dog to take my mind off it, when I broke into a horrid sweat. I honestly, and I feel embarassed saying it, believed I was having a heart attack. A bloody heart attack. 18 years old. 

Mum didn't think I was, but as a parent, she was concerned; to the pharmacy we rushed, they weren't sure, so walk-in centre it was. A long, long wait before seeing a doctor/nurse, whatever the correct term is. She listened to my pulse, read some data, and concluded - "Jamie, do you have a history of anxiety?"

From that moment, I understood what was happening to me. Anxiety attacks. The idea of me having a heart issue, well, it sent me spiralling. I've suffered since, but each year much less. Pleased to say 2026 is off to a good, no-anxiety breakdowns start.

This may feel random, and to be honest it is. Haven't felt so great this week, and even the smallest of flu's sets me off. I try to hide it, but deep down it sends me spiralling - what about work? The plans I have? Memories I want to make? The world just ends for a bit. That's what illness is to me, and this week, I've had a lot of food for thought.

If you too feel how I do, or ever have done, reach out, I'm here for you. It's the worst, life sometimes feels impossible to life comfortably when it's at its worse, but, you've got this. 

Gratefulness and adulting

Well, I'm grateful for something big this week. The washer. We have to pay, in coins - yes coins in big 2026 - to wash & dry clothes. $3 per cycle, per setting. So a typical week costs $6 to wash and dry clothes in coins, fucking coins for god sake. Sorry, but coins. Makes my morning coffee annoying, every Tuesday like clockwork - "hey mate, just an oat cap, large. Nice one. Oh, and by the way, can we swap change? Just need some 1's and 2's. Any chance?"

Begrudged. Another job for the cashier/barista. There's a laundrette up the road, don't you know? Well, frankly, sod that. Not the highlight of their day, but they often oblige and help as much as they can. 

Anyway, why am I grateful about a washer? Well, turns out the $1 coins fall into the machine rather than into the - what I assume - is an endless money pit inside the machine. What a dream. Washes went from $3 to $1 -- huge win. It's those little wins in the week that can change a day; just please, don't tell my landlord...

On a serious note, despite some heavy partying, I've been adulting. Doing my own shopping with an intention, gradually building up my weight as part of my long-term growth plan for my physical build. And honestly, I've never hit the gym harder than this week. I actually left sessions proud of how I conducted my time at the gym. That didn't used to be common, but now it is. I want to be bigger, I will achieve it. Soon. Yep.

I feel like I'm maturing, and I'm actually seeing it with my own eyes. Spotify said i'm 64, and my mates at home all say I'm "wiser than my years" - well, maybe I'm, finally seeing it. Or maybe they just think I'm a boring bastard...maybe. Just maybe,

On a serious note though, I'm grateful, and so lucky to have the support of amazing friends & family. Shoutout to all the vic crew, Dan, Dec, Mum, Nanny, Meg, Dez, Dad, everyone in my life - I'm so lucky. Oh, and the Cabana crew - you guys may never read this, but I adore you all. I almost flew home, and that bar, it gave me a new hope and new focus. I'll never, ever forget that.

Keep being grateful, I know I am.

This weeks take aways

Yeahhh it's that part of the blog - what did I takeaway from this week?

Well, maybe that I need to wear more suncream. Like way more. Me and my friends, shoutout Mick, Brendan, Will, Avram & Shane by the way - lots of love for them - we all went to Parsley bay. This old fashioned, white-paint bridge over a beautiful little cove area. A nice swim, I only swam because there was no sharks - cheers to the net. Panting, maybe I need to swim more, but we had loads of fun. Bit of tennis, or whatever the game was, an espresso, lemon ice-tea, and some tanning (burning) - the weekend was awesome. Those wholesome moments with friends, amazing days out, I need that. I'm lucky to have the friends I do. Oh, and we partied hard. So don't think that we just do beach days, we earn that relaxing time.

So really, the ongoing theme is this - do that thing your mate asks you to do with them. Go for that beer. Have that strange dish from the weird hole in the wall shop. Go for that morning walk, swim, jog. Give that mate a hug before you leave somewhere. Be spontaneous and just enjoy the unfolding chaos. That's the fun of travelling.

I've had so many deep conversations, laughs, moments of new memories - all of it this week. I'm grateful for this week, it has taught me a lot, Some other things happened, and I will get to that, maybe just not this week - but soon. I'll leave it at that.

Another week is upon us, and I'm sorry this is late, like I said, not been so well, but I promise, I'll be back EVERY Monday/Tuesday, so do not miss a blog.

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Have the most amazing week 

Jamie x